Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Nervous Nanny

Life is funny. We ask for things and then when we get them, we realize how much change actually scares us. This has been my pattern my whole life. I wanted so badly to be a middle schooler and nearly passed out from fear on my first day. Couldn't wait to leave behind the salmon and teal walls of SCMS to go on to be a high schooler. Almost faked sick on my first day of high school. Wished I could leave behind all of the drama of high school, only to cry the night before I started my first semester at Dixie. Now I'm being faced with what I feel is a mammoth change. BYU. Wait. Did I say I wanted to move to the freezing cold, away from my family, friends, and everything I've grown so accustomed to? It's true. I'm the one who applied. It was me who signed up for classes. I'm also the one who searched high and low for a dwelling. It was me. The same me who is now second guessing myself.

The bright side is this. I survived middle school and maybe even enjoyed portions. I met some amazing friends in high school, of whom I'll love forever. College wasn't nearly as scary as I imagined. Something (and not just my mom) tells me I'm in for a surprise at the Y. Hopefully my nervous nanny-ness wears off soon.

1 comment:

jessica renae said...

sabrina, you will be just fine! the nerves will wear off once you're all settled. i was a basket case, too. and everything's been wonderful! i can't wait to have you here and see you all the time again!